1000+ Funny Jokes 2025 latest
Looking for the best funny jokes to brighten your day? Discover our 1000+ Funny Jokes 2025 collection, featuring the latest, most hilarious jokes that will leave you laughing out loud. Whether you love short jokes, one-liners, or silly puns, we’ve got you covered with fresh, shareable content. Perfect for WhatsApp, Instagram captions, and making your friends smile!
Funny Joke images 2025 latest || lws jokes
Looking for the funniest joke images of 2025? Get ready to laugh out loud with our latest collection of hilarious memes, funny pictures, and viral joke images. Whether you love witty one-liners, relatable humor, or goofy cartoons, we have something for everyone!
In today’s digital world, laughter is just a click away! Funny joke images are a great way to brighten your day and share joy with friends and family. Our 2025 collection features trending memes, witty captions, and creative illustrations that will leave you in splits. Whether it's a hilarious take on everyday life, work-from-home struggles, relationship humor, or just silly puns, our latest images will keep you entertained.
Why Are Joke Images So Popular?
In today’s fast-paced world, laughter is the best stress-buster. Funny images, memes, and joke illustrations spread joy instantly, making them perfect for sharing on social media or with loved ones. Our 2025 joke image collection includes:
- Work-from-home struggles – Because Zoom meetings are never as productive as they seem! 😆
- Relationship humor – The everyday battles of couples, perfectly captured in hilarious memes.
- Tech & social media jokes – From AI fails to viral trends, we bring the funniest takes on digital life.
- Silly puns & dad jokes – Because sometimes, the cheesiest jokes are the funniest! 🧀
- Relatable daily life humor – Whether it’s Monday blues, shopping fails, or diet struggles, we’ve got you covered.
What Makes Our 2025 Joke Images Special?
- High-quality, creative designs – Our joke images aren’t just funny; they’re visually appealing and share-worthy.
- Fresh & updated content – We keep up with the latest internet trends to bring you new and trending memes.
- Perfect for social sharing – Whether you want to post on WhatsApp, Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter, our joke images are perfect for every platform.
- A laugh for everyone – From witty intellectual humor to lighthearted fun, our collection caters to all age groups and tastes.
Get Your Daily Dose of Laughter! 🤣
Laughter is contagious, and our funny joke images are here to keep you smiling all year long. Bookmark this page and check back for fresh updates. Share with your friends and spread the joy! 🎉
Waking up this
Waking up this morning was an eye-opening experience.
pun jokes
Harry prays to God
Harry prays to God: Dear Lord, please make me win the lottery. The next day Harry begs the Lord again: Please make it so I win the lottery, Lord! The next day, Harry again prays: Please, please, dear Lord, make me win the lottery! Suddenly he hears a voice from above: Harry, would you kindly go and buy a lottery ticket.
english jokes
A wealthy man
A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for a few years. One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant. Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to have the child. If she stayed in Italy, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. She agreed, but wondered how he would know when the baby was born. To keep it discrete, he told her to mail him a postcard, and write "Spaghetti" on the back. He would then arrange for child support. One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife. "Honey," she said, "you received a very strange postcard today." "Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it later," he said. The wife handed the card over and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted. On the card was written "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without."
dirty jokes
shrinking my clothes
I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. Turns out it was the refrigerator all along
dad jokes
girl in a bar
A guy's talking to a girl in a bar. He asks her, "What's your name?" She says, "Carmen." He says, "That's a nice name. Who named you, your mother?" She says, "No, I named myself." He says, "Why Carmen?" She says, "Because I like cars and I like men. What's your name?" He says, "Beerfuck."
dirty jokes
thief hire
Why did the thief hire a maid to plan his vacation? He wanted a clean getaway.
pun jokes
going on ahead
What did one hat say to the other?" "Stay here! I'm going on ahead
dad jokes
fitted years ago
I had a neck brace fitted years ago and I've never looked back since
dad jokes
giant once
I met a giant once. I didn't know what to say so I used big words.
pun jokes
barber win
How did the barber win the race? He knew a shortcut.
pun jokes
call an Indian
What do you call an Indian man which is on fire? Ima Singin.
short jokes
redhead all work
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all work at the same office for a female boss who always goes home early. "Hey girls," says the brunette, "Let's go home early tomorrow. She'll never know." The next day, they all leave right after the boss does. The brunette gets some extra gardening done, the redhead goes to a bar, and the blonde goes home to find her husband having sex with the female boss! She quietly sneaks out of the house and returns at her normal time. "That was fun," says the brunette. "We should do it again sometime." "No way," says the blonde. "I almost got caught!"
blonde jokes
Mexican fire chief
What did the Mexican fire chief name his two sons? Hose A and Hose B!
short jokes
blondes fell down
Two blondes fell down a hole. One said, "It's dark in here isn't it?" The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see."
blonde jokes
Ima Singin
This is Ima Singin, I am really offended by this joke. There is Sum Ting Wong with your sense of humor if you think thats funny
short jokes
oral and a rectal
What's the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer? The taste!
dirty jokes
bigger than your brothers
A husband says to his wife, "I bet you can't tell me something that will make me both happy and sad at the same time." The wife thinks about it for a few moments and replies, "Your dick is bigger than your brothers."
dirty jokes
a taser once
I had a taser once. It was stunning.
pun jokes
a soda machine
A blonde goes to a soda machine. She puts in a dollar and gets a soda. She does this again and again. A man in line behind her asks why she is taking so long. She says, "Can't you see I'm winning?"
blonde jokes
my stuff
My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right.
dad jokes
out of money
A blonde, out of money, and down on her luck after buying air at a real bargain, needed money desperately. To raise cash, she decided to kidnap a child and hold him for ransom. She went to the local playground, grabbed a kid randomly, took her behind a building, and told her, "I've kidnapped you." She then wrote a big note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and leave it under the apple tree next to the slides, on the south side of the playground. Signed, A blonde." The blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning, the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the apple tree. The blonde looked in the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?"
blonde jokes
Three blondes walk
Three blondes walk into a building. You'd think one of them would've seen it.....
blonde jokes
My whole body
Brunette: "Where were you born?" Blonde: "The United States." Brunette: "Which part?" Blonde: "My whole body."
blonde jokes
walked into a couch
A chemist walked into a couch store and ended up buying a photon.
pun jokes
shower is fun
Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it's a soap opera
dad jokes
the last guy
A patient says, “Doctor, can I get AIDS from a toilet seat?” The doctor replies, “Yes, but only by sitting down before the last guy gets up.”
dirty jokes
A teenage boy
A teenage boy takes a quadriplegic girl on a date to dinner and the movies. At the end of the night out, he drives her back home and they start making out in his car. He tells the girl he feels uncomfortable doing this where her parents could come outside and catch them in the act. She says not to worry because she has a place they can go. So he helps her in her chair and she tells him to wheel her into the backyard. When they get in the back, she shows him a huge weeping willow tree that they can hide under and says he can do whatever he wants to her. Under the tree, she shows him two branches that can prop her up and he has his way with her. When they finish, he dresses himself and her, puts back into her chair, wheels her to the front door, and knocks. When her father sees the young man, he thanks him. The boy feels very uncomfortable because of what he just did to the man's daughter and asks, "Why are you thanking me?" "Because son," the father answers, "You are the first boy to take her out of the tree."
dirty jokes
blondes girls were walking
Three blondes girls were walking in the woods and came upon tracks. The first one said, "Look, it's deer tracks." The second one said, "No, it's wolf tracks" and before the third one could answer, they got hit by a train.
blonde jokes
Penis and Balls
One night, Penis and Balls were sitting in a couch. Penis said to Balls, "We are going to a party. Balls said, "F*ck off, you always leave me knocking."
dirty jokes
kinky and perverted
What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.
dirty jokes
One day a blonde
One day a blonde went into the library and asked the librarian, "Can I have a burger and fries?" The librarian replied, "This is the library." Then blonde whispered, "Oh. Can I have a burger and fries?"
blonde jokes
smells like worms
What is transparent and smells like worms? - A bird's fart :-)
stupid jokes
problem with scientists
What's the problem with scientists? Periodically they're wrong.
pun jokes
Olympic medals
Mexico doesn't win Olympic medals because all the best runners, jumpers, and swimmers are in America.
short jokes
babies come from
A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex.” The daughter looks puzzled so the mother continues, “That means the daddy puts his penis in the mommy’s vagina. That’s how you get a baby, honey.” The child seems to comprehend. “Oh, I see, but the other night when I came into your room you had daddy’s penis in your mouth. What do you get when you do that?” “Jewelry, my dear. Jewelry.”
dirty jokes
redhead are all
A blonde, brunette, and redhead are all on a building about to jump off. They all jump at the same time. Which one landed last? The blonde because she asked for directions.
blonde jokes
restaurant on the moon
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? I heard the food was good but it had no atmosphere.
pun jokes
drug dealer
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
dad jokes
Geology rocks
Geology rocks but Geography is where it’s at!
pun jokes
hundred dollar bill
Teacher: Why are you late? Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill. Teacher: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it? Student: No. I was standing on it.
english jokes
concert only costs
What kind of concert only costs 45 cents? A 50 Cent concert featuring Nickelback.
pun jokes
The women need
A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram." She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word "comfortable." Skeptical, the operator asks, "How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?" The redhead replies, "She's a blonde so she reads slow: 'Come for ta bull.'"
blonde jokes
heart of the lion
My grandpa has the heart of the lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
pun jokes
neighbor's house
A blonde's neighbor's house was on fire so she called 911. The blonde told the operator, "My neighbor's house is on fire!" The operator asked, "Where are you?" The blonde answered, "At my house." The operator replied, "No, I'm asking how do we get there?" The blonde said, "In a firetruck, duh!"
blonde jokes
sweet potatoes wear
What do sweet potatoes wear to bed? Yammies.
pun jokes
corduroy pillows
Did you know corduroy pillows are in style? They're making headlines
dad jokes
grow up
Dear Math, grow up and solve your own problems
dad jokes
Christmas is your right
If Thanksgiving is your left leg and Christmas is your right leg, can I visit between the holidays?
dirty jokes
moon cut
How does the moon cut his hair?" "Eclipse it.
dad jokes
A blind guy
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, you should know something. Our bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I’m a six foot tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is six foot two, weighs 225, and he’s a rugby player. The fella to your right is six foot five, pushing 300, and he’s a wrestler. Each one of us is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?" The blind guy says, “Nah, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times."
blonde jokes
got carded
I got carded at a liquor store, and my Blockbuster card accidentally fell out. The cashier said never mind.
dad jokes
super hot chick
A super hot chick walks into her church and says to the priest, "Forgive me Father, for I have sinned." The priest says, "Tell me dear, what's on your mind?" "Well Father, I am a sex addict, and lately I discovered that I like doing it with priests. I had sex with the one from the church two blocks from here, the one five blocks from here, and also the one from the church nearby." The priest says, "It's okay, just pray three times a day for one week and it will all be okay." As the girl tries to go out, the priest says, "Oh, and dont forget that I will always be here for you!"
dirty jokes
Why should you wear
Why should you wear glasses when doing math? They improve division.
pun jokes
A sailor drops
A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders. As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"
dirty jokes
Don't be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
short jokes
more letters
What has more letters than the alphabet?" "The post office!
dad jokes
scratch-and-sniff
How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch-and-sniff at the bottom of a pool.
blonde jokes
sophisticated dinner party
I was at a sophisticated dinner party the other day… when I farted loudly. One of the guests was appalled and said indignantly, “How dare you fart in front of my wife!” I said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize it was her turn next
dirty jokes
child birth
From what I understand about child birth, it changes you ‘downstairs’. I like my downstairs the way it is thank you very much. I certainly don’t need an extension
dirty jokes
The Little Rascal's
The Little Rascal's class were having a spelling test. The teacher asks if anyone can use the word "admire" in a sentence. Spanky raises his hand and says, "I admire my dog." "Good job," the teacher replies, "Now, who can use 'respect' in a sentence?" Alfalfa raises his hand and says, "I respect Spanky for admiring his dog." "Ok, " replies the teacher, "now who can use the word 'dictate' in a sentence?" There is silence in the class, then all of a sudden Buckwheat says, "Darla how did my dictate !?!"
dirty jokes
blonde runs
A robber comes into the store & steals a TV. A blonde runs after him and says, "Wait, you forgot the remote!"
english jokes
guy decides
A guy decides to do something nice for his girlfriend before they leave on vacation so he gets her name tattooed on his penis. He comes home and shows it to her. She looks at it and says, "That's great, sweetie, but what is 'Wy'?" He tells her to rub it and as she does she sees it actually reads "Wendy." When they arrive at Montego Bay, the couple are walking along a nude beach and the boyfriend notices a black guy with "Wy" on his penis. He asks the man if he also has a girlfriend named Wendy. The black guy laughs and says, "Nah, mon, mine says 'Welcome to Jamaica have a nice day.'"
dirty jokes
Santa reading newspaper
Santa reading newspaper.. News: "Indian athlete lost gold medal in long jump" Santa comments: Idiot !! Who told him to wear gold medal while jumping!!! 😁😁🤣😁
english jokes
banana split
Where do you learn to make a banana split?" "Sundae school
dad jokes
broken rubber
A kid walks up to his mom and asks, "Mom, can I go bungee jumping?" The mom says "No, you were born from broken rubber and I don't want you to go out the same way!"
dirty jokes
unfaithful espresso
Did you hear about the unfaithful espresso? It was grounds for divorce.
pun jokes
worth of used
What do you do with a year’s worth of used condoms? A. Melt them into a tire and call it a goodyear.
dirty jokes
sets of lips
Why do woman have two sets of lips? One set to tell you off with, and the other to make you forget you're mad!
dirty jokes
black man is lost
A black man is lost in the forest. A hunter finds him and says, "Excuse me, sir. Can you ax me a tree?" The black man says, "No, but I can ax you a question?"
short jokes
poor Santa Claus
What do you call a poor Santa Claus?" "St. Nickel-less
dad jokes
blonde went into the library
One day a blonde went into the library and asked the librarian, "Can I have a burger and fries?" The librarian replied, "This is the library." Then blonde whispered, "Oh. Can I have a burger and fries?"
blonde jokes
Nobody ever listens
Patient: Doctor! You've got to help me! Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say. Doctor: Next please!
english jokes
sign of inflation
What is the sign of inflation? A Volkswagen with 12 Latinos in it.
short jokes
Before Marriage
Before Marriage - - - Boyfriend: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait. Girlfriend: Do you want me to leave? Boyfriend: NO! Don't even think about it. Girlfriend: Do you love me? Boyfriend: Of course! Over and over! Girlfriend: Have you ever cheated on me? Boyfriend: NO! Why are you even asking? Girlfriend: Will you kiss me? Boyfriend: Every chance I get! Girlfriend: Will you hit me? Boyfriend: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person! Girlfriend: Can I trust you? Boyfriend: Yes. Girlfriend: Darling! After marriage - simply read from bottom to top.
english jokes
12 inches long
Why can't a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
dad jokes
Akbar joke
Teacher: Who was Akbar ? Boy: Akbar was Gay. Teacher:- What, Are you mad ? Why did you say that? Boy:- We have heard Laila – Majnu, Heer -Ranjha, Soni- Mahival, Romeo-Juliet But Only Akbar – Birbal !😁
teacher student jokes in english
kind of bees
Q: What kind of bees make milk instead of honey? A: Boo-bees
dirty jokes
naked woman
A statue of a naked woman and a naked man stand in a park at night. Suddenly from out of nowhere, a magical genie arrives and grants the statues each one wish to be fulfilled. Both the female and male statues agree on 15 minutes as a real man and woman in the bushes behind them to "get things done." The genie gives a knowing grin and grants the wish. The man and woman immediately jump behind the bushes and screaming sounds and laughter can be heard from their activities. 12 minutes later they return to the front of the bush again claiming they are finished. "Well now, that was kinda quick!" the genie says. "You can do it a second time for the remaining 3 minutes if you want," the genie tells them, winking his eye. Both the female and male look at each other and smile. The man says to the woman, "Okay great, but this time you get to hold the pigeon so I can shit on him!"
dirty jokes
like a snowstorm
A man is like a snowstorm. You never know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long it will last.
dirty jokes
prostitute
Two men visit a prostitute. The first man goes into the bedroom. He comes out ten minutes later and says, "Heck. My wife is better than that." The second man goes in. He comes out ten minutes later and says, "You know? Your wife IS better."
dirty jokes
A little girl and boy
A little girl and boy are fighting about the differences between the sexes, and which one is better. Finally, the boy drops his pants and says, “Here’s something I have that you’ll never have!” The little girl is pretty upset by this, since it is clearly true, and runs home crying. A while later, she comes running back with a smile on her face. She drops her pants and says, “My mommy says that with one of these, I can have as many of those as I want!”
dirty jokes
a black man joke
There is a black man, a white man, and a Mexican man on a plane that is too heavy to fly and they are about to crash. They each have to throw something off the plane to save them from crashing. The black man throws out his Jordan shoes and says, "We have too many in our country.” The Mexican tosses out his lawn mower and says, "We have too many in our country.” The white man puts his item down, grabs the Mexican, throws him out the window and says, "We have too many in our country.
short jokes
time-traveling joke
I was going to tell a time-traveling joke, but you guys didn't like it
dad jokes
Screw the mailman
I'm a mailman. At Christmas this year, Mrs. Jankowitz met me at the door and invited me in for a great breakfast spread. After I ate, I thanked her and she said, "There's more." She took me to her bedroom and showed me moves I had never imagined. I told her I had no idea she felt this way. She said, "I don't." I ask, "What was all this about?" She says, "I asked the husband what to give the mailman." He said, "Screw the mailman, breakfast was my idea."
dirty jokes
favorite sport
What is the favorite sport of Mexicans? Cross Country
short jokes
I don't trust trees
I don't trust trees. They're shady.
pun jokes
seafood diet
I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it
dad jokes
A husband suspected
A husband suspected his wife was cheating on him. He explained his situation to a pet shop owner who replied, "I have a parrot that will let you know daily what goes on in your house. The bird has no legs, so he holds onto his perch with his penis." Reluctantly, the husband brought the bird home. At the end of the first day, the man asked the bird, "Did anything happen today?" The parrot said, "Yes, the milk man came over." The man asked, "What did he do with my wife?" The bird said, "I don’t know; I got hard and fell."
dirty jokes
white owl and a black owl
Q:what's the difference between a white owl and a black owl. A:a white owl goes who who. a black owl goes who dat who dat.
short jokes
Little Sally came
Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face, and told her mother, "Frankie Brown showed me his weenie today at the playground!" Before the mother could raise a concern, Sally went on to say, "It reminded me of a peanut." Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's mom asked, "Really small, was it?" Sally replied, "No, salty." Mom fainted.
dirty jokes
couldn't the blonde
Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 + 5 on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the "10" button.
blonde jokes
A science teacher
A science teacher tells his class, "Oxygen is a must for breathing and life. It was discovered in 1773." A blonde student responds, "Thank God I was born after 1773! Otherwise I would have died without it."
blonde jokes
Two prostitutes
Two prostitutes are standing on a corner. One says, "Tonight is gonna be a good night. I can smell the dick in the air." The other says, "Sorry, I just burped."
dirty jokes
making Russian tea
I was making Russian tea. Unfortunately I cannot fish the teabag out of the vodka bottle.
english jokes
IDK Blonde
Blonde: "What does IDK stand for?" Brunette: "I don’t know." Blonde: "OMG, nobody does!
blonde jokes
blonde are walking
A brunette and blonde are walking in the park when the brunette says, "Aw, look at the dead birdie." The blonde looks up and says, "Where?"
blonde jokes
go to the bathroom
Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom? Teacher: Little Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom? Little Johnny: But I asked first!
english jokes
brunette were thinking
A blonde, redhead, and a brunette were thinking about what they would do if they went to space. The redhead said, "I would adopt a martian." The brunette said, "I would give Pluto some steroids." The Blonde said, "I would go to the sun." The redhead replied, "But you would burn up and die." The blonde responded, "Not if I went at night."
blonde jokes
laugh on Saturday
Q: How can you get a blonde to laugh on Saturday? A: Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
blonde jokes
you trust stairs
Why shouldn't you trust stairs? They're always up to something.
pun jokes
grasp the concept
Q: Why can't blondes tie shoes? A: They just can't grasp the concept that the long thing goes around the hole, not into it.
blonde jokes
Polish Navy
Why does the Polish Navy have glass-bottomed boats? So they can see the old Polish Navy.
short jokes
difference between your penis
What's the difference between your penis and a bonus check? Someone's always willing to blow your bonus.
dirty jokes
A guy believed
A guy believed that his wife is cheating on him, so he hired a private investigator. The cheapest he could find was a Chinese man. This was the Chinese PI's report about what he found: "Most honorable, sir. You leave house. I watch house. He come to house. I watch. He and she leave house. I follow. He and she go in hotel. I climb tree. I look in window. He kiss she. He strip she. She strip he. He play with she. She play with he. I play with me. I fall out tree. I not see. No fee. Cheng Lee.
short jokes
What does a lemon say
What does a lemon say when it answers the phone?" "Yellow!
dad jokes
hard of hearing
Santa, hard of hearing, realises that he needs to buy a hearing aid, but he feels unwilling to spend too much money. 'How much do they cost?' he asks Manbir, the shopkeeper. 'That depends,' says. Manbir, 'They run from £20 to £2,000.' 'Let's see the £20 model,' asks Santa. Manbir puts the device around Santa's neck instructing, 'You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket.' 'How does it work?' Santa inquires. 'For only £20 it doesn't work," Manbir replies, 'But when people see it on you, they'll talk louder!'
santa banta jokes in english
doctor's office
A brunette goes into a doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. "Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me." She takes her finger, presses on her elbow, and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams, and so it goes on; everywhere she touches makes her scream with pain. The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette are you?" She says, "No, I dyed my hair. I'm naturally blonde." "I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken."
blonde jokes
favorite prize
Q: What's a WASP's favorite prize? A: The Lilly Pulitzer prize.
short jokes
Long fairy tales
Long fairy tales have a tendency to dragon.
pun jokes
a bit of tomato sauce
A husband and a wife sit at the table, having dinner. The woman drops a bit of tomato sauce on her white top. "Och, I look like a pig!" The man nods, "And you dropped tomato sauce on your top!"
english jokes
A black boy joke
A black boy walks into the kitchen where his mother is baking and accidentally pulls the flour over onto his head. He turns to his mother and says, “Look Mama, I’m a white boy!” His mother smacks him and says, “Go tell your Daddy what you just said!” The boy finds his father and says, “Look Daddy, I’m a white boy!” His Daddy bends him over, spanks him, stands the boy back up, and says, “Now, what do you have to say for yourself?” The boy replies, “I’ve only been a white boy for five minutes and I already hate you black people!”
short jokes
A couple is trying
A couple is trying to have a baby. Finally, the blonde tells her husband, "Honey, I have great news! We're pregnant, and we're having twins!" The husband is overjoyed and says to his wife, "Honey that's wonderful, but how do you know so soon that we're having twins?" She nods her head and says, "Well, I bought the twin pack pregnancy test and they both came out positive!"
blonde jokes
may I interview you
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
dirty jokes
call them bagels
Why do seagulls fly over the ocean?" "Because if they flew over the bay, we'd call them bagels
dad jokes
I made a pun
I made a pun about the wind but it blows.
pun jokes